Health-e-Weight for Women

What you say to yourself can make a big difference in how, what and when you eat. Your thoughts and images and self-esteem strongly affect the way you feel and behave.

By paying attention to the statements made about oneself, about others, about food-related and weight-related problems, changes can be initiated toward more positive thinking, an important step in the right direction.

In helping people with long-term weight loss, we have found it important to help people "hear" their inner voice. Very often, these thoughts which play over and over like a tape recorder, are negative and self-defeating.

Do you recognize yourself in any of the "negative" thought patterns below?

All-or-nothing thinking

You see things as black-and-white - there's no room for grey in your world. If your performance falls short of perfect, you see yourself as a total failure.
Example: "I have to eat 'perfectly' every day; I can't eat one thing off my plan or I won't lose weight."
"I'll never eat chocolate again, because I can't have just one piece."

Overgeneralization

You see a single negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.
Example: "One piece of dessert this week means I've blown my eating pattern and probably gained at least one pound."

Disqualifying the positive

You reject positive experiences by insisting they "don't count" for some reason or other. In this way you can maintain a negative belief even though it doesn't match your everyday experiences.
Example: "There was that one month that I ate really well and exercised, and even lost a few pounds, but I'm sure I could never do that again."

Jumping to conclusions

You interpret things negatively even though there are no definite facts to support your conclusion. You may try mind reading, in which you assume that someone is reacting negatively toward you and you don't bother to check it out; or fortune telling, anticipating that things will turn out badly.
Example: "When I order dessert in a restaurant, even the waitress looks at me like I shouldn't be having it."
"I can't eat out at restaurants because I won't control myself."

Magnification or minimization

You exaggerate the importance of things (your goof-up or someone else's achievement) or you inappropriately shrink things until they appear tiny (your own good qualities or another person's imperfections).
Example: "The one time I lose weight it was only because I was living at home - mom was cooking - and I was going to that great aerobics class at the gym close by."

Emotional reasoning

You assume that your negative emotions reflect the way things really are: "I feel it, so it must be true."
Example: "I ate chips and now I feel bad, so I must not be doing well."
Words to live by: "Whether you think you can or you can't, you are probably right."

"Should" statements

You try to motivate yourself with "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts", as if you have to be punished before you can be expected to do anything. "Musts" and "oughts" also are offenders. Guilt is the emotional consequence.
Example: "I should be able to avoid all sweets when I'm trying to lose weight. If I can't, I mustn't have any will power."

Labeling/mislabeling

This is an extreme form of overgeneralization. Instead of describing your mistake, you attach a negative label to yourself: for example, "I'm a loser". Mislabeling involves describing an event with highly colored, emotionally loaded language.
Example: "I'm either disorganized or lazy because I can't seem to find time to exercise between juggling my busy job and family time."

Personalization

You see yourself as the cause of some negative external event that you were not primarily responsible for.
Example: "I overate at the staff meeting because I forgot to tell everyone to bring something, and we had to order pizzas."

Practice positive thinking today!

You can learn to control what you think about yourself and change your "negative thoughts" to positive ones!

Copyright 2002 Brigham and Women's Hospital